Vintage Bird Lost At Sea

So…I went to go see Fiona Apple at The Hollywood Palladium on July 29, the last show of her tour. I was reminded by a friend at the Marina & the Diamonds concert 2 weeks prior that Fiona’s show was at the end of July, instead of August like I thought. The entire month of June & beginning of July was a nightmare for me, due to ER visits, being in pain & on Morphine, so I think I checked the tour dates around that time ;) When I was loopy. When my friend told me Fiona was playing at the end of July I got a knot in my stomach because I knew I didn’t have a ticket to the small sold out show and I was broke at that time anyhow. So, I was just planning on taking that 45 min drive over to the venue just to see what would happen. It was FIONA, so I planned on being in that area rather I had a Tix or not! She’s my fav, besides Tori & Regina, as you all know.

So, when I woke up it was a pretty day and I made my coffee and sat and finished Fiona’s letter I planned to give her. I, being mad at myself for saving everything until the last minute! I wanted to be around the venue at 3, but with all I had to do I got there around 7! I actually thought The Palladium was on Vine & Hollywood, where I saw Perry Farrell years ago. I was wrong! I drove by & it looked abandoned & shut down. SO, I was like wtf? No problem I’ll just ask around. After asking about 5 people that didn’t know I kinda got a bit worried until I drove around the corner & saw a dude in a corvette, I said to myself that this guy has to know, And he did! He said a few blocks that ahead on Sunset. I found it right away! Living in Hollywood in the past myself for 7 yrs you would think that I would know where it was, but I never saw this place before for some reason!? I have been to every venue except this one. This venue is kinda weird. Who knows, maybe I have been there & just don’t remember. Has Tori Amos ever played at The Palladium before? If so, then yes, I have been there.

I get there 4 hrs later then planned, broke and wishing for the best, To pray on, or wish on, or something like that ;p … I didn’t have money for parking & even if I did I would NOT pay 15-20 to park! Nutso! I drove around the same block about 5 or 6 times & literally prayed for someone “to just be pulling out when I drive by” and 2 seconds later I drive around the corner & BOOM there were chicks leaving the Chicken & waffle place! Thank You God and thank You universe! Right on time! I pull up to the meter & park. Not knowing what to do cause I never pay for parking, I asked passersby to help. I only had to put in 4 quarters. So I did & crossed to street to go to the restroom at Denny’s. I walked to the venue by the back gate/door area hoping to run into Fiona to give her my letter. The venue guy said that I missed her by 10 minutes, he thinks. Not being sure if it was Fiona I waited for a a while, I never even planned on trying to find a tix because I was broke, so I didn’t plan on going to the show & I was alright with that since I’m going to some of her other shows.

I sat & shoot the breeze w/the cool venue guy, sat there as I saw Carina Round walk up w/some friends. I asked her “Is your name Carina?” She smiled & said “Yes”, I told her that I was friends w/Eva & I shook her hand. She said “Oh yeah, what is your name?” I told her & we chatted for a minute, took a photo & she shook my hand again as I told her that “Eva was such a good promoter, she talks about you all the time”. Carina smiled & held her hand to her chest as she walked away, I told her to tell Eva that I said “Hi”. After Carina walked away that’s when this nightmare Matt walked up talking his bullshit, ruining my Fiona experience! He was a truck driver for some of the lighting & equipment. I was having a nice time until this debbie downer came along. He talked all kinds of bullshit about how he hated working with “celebs”, how none of them matter to him, how he kept saying he couldn’t wait for his fav Fiona song, being the last one so he can get the fuck out of here. He bragged how many places he’d been, but at the same time saying he hated it job?! He told me he didn’t even know who Fiona was & that he didn’t care. That he didn’t even like music & that he walked away from Eric Clapton concerts just because he’s too cool. This guy’s a fucking idiot! He stood there, all 350 pounds of him & his belly hanging over his shorts telling me how bad ass he was, how many asses he kicked & that he didn’t care about any Stars except for Jenna Jameson! So you know where his head’s at & his hand! Haha! He went on bragging about how Fiona bought him a huge filet mignon & lobster tail in Colorado & all I had to say was “poor Lobster”, but he didn’t “get It”. He went on talking trash about my/our Fiona! How she’s shy, doesn’t like being around people, how she smokes so much weed & it took the bus driver an hour to wake her up & all she does is sleep and is a diva asking the photographers to only be in one certain area as to catch her “good side”. I was trying to talk sense into this piece of shit, but he just wouldn’t listen! He went on to argue with me that Fiona was pussy music & only girls & gay guys like her. that the men that liked Fiona’s music have no balls & that their girlfriends force them to come to the shows. he went on with his Homophobic rant & I again, told him basically how stupid he was, but he just wouldn’t listen! His mouth wouldn’t stop with the racist jokes about Obama & how pathetic I was or anyone that goes to shows or does tours. I asked him what was so pathetic about being with friends, traveling & seeing different places, seeing your fav artist whom inspires you. He had no answer, but tried back peddling. Didn’t work asshole! Who’s the pathetic blob here? I think we all know. So fuck you Matt!

I heard Fiona start singing, so obviously she was already in the building & I did infact miss her. So, I said I gotta go & mozzied off down the sidewalk checking my phone that got a text from a friend asking if I got a ticket. I thought I’d walk around the building, trying to find the entrance, such a weird building! The front entrance was boarded up & I thought to myself Wow, they really close up after the show starts!! They mean business! Until a homeless man told me the entrance was around the corner. Fiona was already well into her 2nd song when I came around the corner & there was a good looking guy standing there by the gate alone. He asked me if I had a ticket. I said in a sad voice “Noooooo”. He said “I give you a ticket, you just have to come in with me.” OMG! It was all so magical. It was too easy to believe. Nobody else was out there, just him. I walked in w/him hiding my camera in my bra. I asked his name “Robert”, he asked mine. With a hug & a “oh my god, thank you so much, you have no idea” we departed. Thank You Robert wherever you are!

I looked around & at the bar for my friend, but couldn’t find him, So I walked into this weird ass venue that felt like being inside a spaceship. It was PACKED!! I usually go to the right side, but I walked to the left side where there was more room. I finally find my spot & found that I was surrounded by loud, annoying,  swaying, drunk sing alongs! OH FUCKING GREAT! Got a drink spilt on one of my feet & bumped a few times, but when a few people moved out I moved in & tried to get closer for some shots/video. I’m not use to being this far from the stage, but I’m not going to complain, I got in for free thinking I really wasn’t & got a pretty decent spot. I wanted to record Shadowboxer cause it’s a fav, but she was already doing it as I was walking in. I been to Fiona shows in the past & really enjoyed them, a little better then this performance. The vintage dresses were replaced by rags? :( and maybe she was really high because her eyes were closed for half the show. The show seemed to go by super fast, as she went thru the songs without talking or anything. She was prolly tired, being the last show, I understand. But I love her to death and always will. She surprised by doing one of my fav songs CARRION!! I have never seen so many drunks in one place at a time.

After the show I went back to where I was before & there was stupid Matt still standing there. I gave him a dirty look & he left. Thank god. I was sore, tired, hungry, cold, my feet ached, but my middle name is persistence…so! I wait. And wait, and waited some more. Fiona’s brother now works as a roadie for her & he passed me a few times throughout the day/night. I said Hello to him & told him how I use to live near Fiona & these 2 jerks were following Fiona home & how I followed them, following her home to make sure they didn’t try anything! I also reminded him about how him & Fiona almost ran me over in 2005 at The Wiltern on the way in to the show. He laughed. And told him about what happened when they came out after the concert. I was lucky enough to talk to Fiona alone & give her my letter back then when they were in a junky red pick up truck.

The venue guy came out & told us Fiona had left already, she went home. I knew it was bullshit because they all say that to get people to leave. After a hour people left, there were only 7 people remaining. Some debating they should leave, I like a “good Fan” told them “not too, trust me she’s coming out”. I could have told them that she wasn’t coming out so they would leave, less people the better, more time to talk to Fiona. Fiona finally came out maybe after an 1 hr 1/2?

Brandon, her brother led her right to me first & told her that I was waiting for her all night. I said Hello to Fiona, gave her hug, handed her my letter & I stepped her aside & asked her if she would really read my letter, She held the letter tightly & looked at it & said quite loudly & stern “Of Course I will”, Of Course.” Then took a photo w/her & told her about my Tumblr blog, she thought was cute!! Her smile is so sweet. We talked about that last Wiltern show & how I use to live by her. We talked about a few other things. I wanted to take a few more photos of Fiona, but a guy handed me his heavy camera & wanted me to take photos of him & Fiona, so I did. They turned out great! His shot with Fiona is so cute! Oh well, everything always happens too fast in situation likes these. Her brother & a few brutes whisked her away to the tour bus, I had to walk past to get to me car. Walking while looking at my photos & amazed how nice they came out! As I turned the corner to get to my car I was happy to find a lovely Fiona flyer for her show at The Greek as I reached for my car handle. :)

I looked up as I saw her tour bus drove away into the night and I gave a wave goodbye… and she was off. to bed. in Venice. Goodnight Fiona. Sleep to Dream.

I was happy & content and in total disbelief how everything went sooooooo smooth. So smooth! It was almost too good to be true.

I was only going to write a paragraph or two & here is a story with every freakin’ detail, why do I always do this?

Lord Help me for the way I am…

Fiona Apple at the HOLLYWOOD PALLADIUM on July 29, 2012
Sorry about the shaking, it was a mess in this venue & my arms were tired from holding them up so high. Usually my videos come out way better. Oh well, at least I have the memory :) Warning: Drunks singing along.